Auto Flush Toilets...

Fuck you, you over achieving asshole! I just sit down and you are rushing me to get off by flushing prematurely and spraying me with shitwater! I'm constantly forced to MacGyver blinders from the garbage they call toilet paper just to use the toilet in peace! I hope you and the person that designed you go to a hell specifically designed for the two of you. One where everything is automatically a dick like you are.
TV's will automatically turn themselves off when you turn them on to conserve electricity. Sink faucets will turn themselves off before you can get a drink of water to conserve water and once every 30 minutes you're sprayed with shitwater directly in your ugly face.




While we're on the subject.

Dear Mr WWII Surplus toilet paper..
You're too fragile to just rip off, you have to be coddled, pulled on gentlly. Many times your roll is too big for your plastic prison making you impossible to roll on the cardboard tube your on so I have to stick my hand up inside that shit and turn it by hand to get any paper from you.
Once I've got a sufficient amount pulled from your roll when I go to tear off a strip you rip FUCKING VERTICALLY ALONG THE DAMN STRIP!



And so that's what pissed me off today, stay tuned for another adventure of 'What's pissing Jason off'. Same BatTime same BatChannel.